Disgusting - Confessions, rants, complaints and funny stories

#12825

Hey! Quit following Fuck around like a lost puppy. It's pathetic! You didn't get the job. Accept it and move on. And brush your teeth! Nobody likes an ass kisser with bad breath!

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08

May

2012

by:

lostpuppy

Category:

Disgusting

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#12815

In the past hour, I've sat on my dorm bed and watched one episode of Skins (UK) on Hulu. Season 6, Episode 2. I've laughed; I've cried… I've made myself cum with my vibrator over 20 times in a row. And I couldn't be more content!

Good one!!! (14)

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29

April

2012

by:

ecqpcjduo

Category:

Disgusting

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#12806

show her you genuinely care about her well being not just winnnig the show. be her friend. we guys tend to not befriend a girl too only see it as getting her as a girlfriend. be the good guy she can turn to make her laugh and again show her you actually care about her.if you dumped her, realize she may not want to get back with you so thats why its safe to just care for her and be a good friend.alot of guys cant be friends with their ex were too weak most the time Was this answer helpful?

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28

April

2012

by:

Annelise

Category:

Disgusting

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#12763

You're ridiculous. Every major city in America has free computer and internet access somewhere. Keep your fuckin comments to yourself.

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10

April

2012

by:

Blankety_blankeyblanks

Category:

Disgusting

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#12754

I would torture my housekeep kick her, smack her, dump water on her, stop her from eating, make her life a hell and work her to death. After 4 years she almost got away so I reported her to immigration and she was deported back to Romania.....................................I AM A BAD PERSON I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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05

April

2012

by:

Anonymous

Category:

Disgusting

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#12737

Grandma's "Gumjobs" are the BEST kind of blowjobs there are!

My grandmother started sucking me off when I was 15.

I had always thought that my Grandmother was kind of "old fashioned", if you know what I mean. You know, short gray hair, granny glasses, and way too much lipstick. She dresses a little "old-fashioned" too (at least on the "outside". My Grandmother always wears a dress or a skirt and blouse or sweater. On the "inside", underneath it all, it's a whole different matter! Thank God she hates wearing pantyhose or panties! Just a garterbelt & stockings!

Anyway, Grandma came home one night and was a little tipsy from consuming a little too much wine at a "Hen Party" (as she calls it) over at a friend's house. She was all giggly (in a teenage girly sort of way) and stuff. I'd never seen her like that before.

Grandma was in a really good mood and she started telling me about "The Girls" and some of the things they had been gabbing about (mostly gossip). Apparently the subject of oral sex came up, and they all started talking (bragging) about their men's penises, oral techniques, the taste of their semen, etc.

Now, my Grandmother was (and still is) a widow and it turns out that she hadn't performed oral sex on a man since the night before Grandpa died. Then she started talking about the size and shape of Grandpa's cock and how good his sperm tasted and how much she missed it, etc.

Listening to my Grandmother go on and on about how much she loved sucking cock and how much she missed doing it all the time, made me a little embarrassed, but it also made me very, VERY, horny too! I couldn't help but wonder what my Grandmother's ruby-red lips would look like wrapped around MY cock!

After a while, I noticed as she talking about "the good old days", she was staring intently at my almost painfully swollen crotch. She licked her lips a little and then asked me to come over and sit next to her, which I did.

When I sat down on the sofa next to her, she turned to me, put her hand on my upper thigh, and asked me if I loved her and would I do her a big favor. I told her that I loved her and that I would be more than happy to do my "Grammy" a favor, any favor, big or small. She smiled at that, then leaned over and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I could smell the wine on her breath and knew that she had left a great big lipstick smear on my face.

As I "innocently" sat next to her, she gently rubbed my thigh, and I wondered if this was going to go the way I had hoped it would.

She was breathing a little heavier and after swearing me to secrecy, she started asking me some VERY un-grandmotherly kind of questions.

Did I know what a Blowjob was? (Yes...)

Have I ever had a Blowjob? (No...)

Would I like to have a Blowjob? (Yes)

Would I like to have a Blowjob right now? (YES!)

Can I keep a secret? (Yes...)

Would I pull down my pants, let her give me a Blowjob right then and there and never, ever tell anyone about it??

YES! YES!! YES!!!

She laughed out loud, took out her dentures, and turned to put them on the side table. By the time she turned back around toward me, my jeans and underwear were down around my ankles, and my hard cock was sticking straight up in the air waiting for her!

And THAT was when I FIRST experienced the full, true joy of getting a deep-throat GUMJOB from an experienced, very grateful, and thirsty, cocksucker!!!

PS. My Mother has been having quite a few dental problems recently and she is scheduled to go into the Dentist's office in a couple of weeks to have all of her teeth pulled. A few weeks after that, she'll be fitted with a full set of dentures. When the Holidays roll around, Grandmother and I are going to get my Mother drunk. When Mom's reaches the point when she's in a really good mood, Grandma's going to get her to start talking about the "Good Old Days" and how nice it would be if there was a male around who had a nice, big, hard cock who wouldn't mind if a couple of old, toothless broads sucked him off every day!

Good one!!! (14)

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22

March

2012

by:

IdetaBato

Category:

Disgusting

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#12661

i didn't want to get up, so i peed in an empty bottle.

Good one!!! (14)

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04

February

2012

by:

Anonymous

Category:

Disgusting

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#12634

When I was in highschool, I would put my dirty tampons in other peoples gym lockers.

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15

January

2012

by:

durtytampont

Category:

Disgusting

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#12592

I'd kill myself anytime just out of curiosity of what goes on the other side. It's not that I don't wanna live, I just wanna see what the fuck we fear so much. I would do it if I knew nobody would be unhappy with my death. And whomever is already typing: "guess what nobodiy would be unhappy" or something in the likes, be original, dumbass.

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18

January

2012

by:

Sherlyn

Category:

Disgusting

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#12559

I've only squirted at climax once and now I'm really afraid I'll do it when I'm with a guy.

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08

January

2012

by:

Satchell

Category:

Disgusting

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#12555

I look through the "who would you f*ck" thread waiting for a picture of someone who looks vaguely like me, even just in body, to be posted. It hasn't happened yet, even though I consider myself averaged sized.

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08

January

2012

by:

Aspen

Category:

Disgusting

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#12549

I know wearing a thong and low cut jeans will highlight the fact that I'm wearing a thong. Everyone stares at my ass. Mission accomplished.

Confession #859:
I've done plenty of things I don't care to admit. This isn't necessarily one of them, but it's something I've never told anyone except for a few police officers and some doctors.

When I was 19, I had a girlfriend. We'll call her Maude. Maude and I were in love, deep in that clingy and nervous pit of love that 19 year olds are or were famous for. It was fireworks and orgasms and waking in night sweats for 6 months before she got pregnant.

Maude was generous, and her heart was like a sponge. She wanted to have the baby. She believed with all the power of blind love that the strength of us and the love of us could raise a child, move a mountain and come back to the hammock for an afternoon nap ... Stuck in the pit of my affection for her and trapped by the bonds we had built, I agreed with all of me. I said as sure as I love you I will quit school and get a job and support us and we'll be parents.

I did it. Our parents hated us.

Near the beginning of the third trimester there were complications. At first, her being sick with child was new to us and we assumed that her problems were common ones: After all, don't all women vomit blood during pregnancy? We went to the doctor, who after a sonogram and some tests, frowned. His eyebrows all heavy he told us that as sure as he was a doctor, it was either her or the baby.

Maude, God bless you, you should have just picked you. And she was the sort of girl to believe in miracles and prayer while I was the sort of boy who didn't know what to do at all. She held on to the baby, and we argued about names and all the while she was paler and weaker.

On April 17th of that year, she lost a beautiful boy in the bathroom. She was alone when it happened. I got home several hours later to one of the most horrific scenes I've ever witnessed: The amount of blood in the bathroom and on the floor was staggering, and I have no frame of reference with which to quantify... The boy was laying blue on the white and now red tile, the cord still attached to her. I am crying again.

I remember just sort of slumping down and weeping and she, curled up near the toilet, blood in her hair and on her hands, began to stir and I suddenly had a burst of energy. I took a towel from the wall and covered her. I told her to stay still. That I would get help. I threw a towel on the baby and the blood started to seep through where it touched the ground.

I ran to the phone.

I called the police. Send help my girlfriend is dying.

She survived and we broke up about two weeks later. I haven't spoken to her since then, but through mutual friends I've found out that she and her now husband have adopted two children, the second fairly recently.

I told my family that we had an abortion.

Good one!!! (33)

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29

December

2011

by:

Elmira

Category:

Disgusting

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#12530

I have seen a donkey show. Even worse, it turned me on.

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22

December

2011

by:

donkeyshow

Category:

Disgusting

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#12521

The other night I was pissed off and working alone. Instead of wiping the tables down with sanitizer, after a reception, I used the sponge floor mop! My arm was sore and it was a lot faster and easier!!

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01

January

2012

by:

Rough kitty

Category:

Disgusting

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#12504

I got into the "Porn that crosses the line" thread just to see if I can rub one out to anything posted in there.

I have yet to be able to (to anything that actually "crosses the line")

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05

December

2011

by:

crosstheline

Category:

Disgusting

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#12503

I once craped my pants walking home from school in the 8th grade :(

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11

December

2011

by:

crappedpants

Category:

Disgusting

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#12494

I moved into my first apartment last summer.
I have learned that it is a thrilling experience to share my genetic material with the world. Late at night. Sometimes I aim for cars (16th floor).

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07

December

2011

by:

peeinpublic

Category:

Disgusting

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#12493

I like to key the cars of people who park too close to me.

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02

December

2011

by:

keyacar

Category:

Disgusting

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#12492

Wow, a whole new way to confess - awesome.

In my previous encounters with members of the opposite sex, I've been teased that I like going for the fat chicks. (Not that there's anything wrong with that!) But I was adamant that it was just a case of cirumstance.

My current girlfriend also teases me about it.

I went to pornotube and searched for fat chicks and found a video of 3 of them in a bathtub

i was aroused :(

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07

December

2011

by:

pornotube

Category:

Disgusting

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#12461

i bought a dill-do for my girlfriend to play with when i'm on my business trips, but i really bought it so i can use it on my ass when she's not around.

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25

November

2011

by:

dildoforme

Category:

Disgusting

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